Mother learns to share son’s care after he moves out
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In Australia, Dimity, a 67-year-old mother, began sharing responsibility for her 27-year-old son Stu’s care after he moved into a purpose-built home with 24/7 support.
Stu is autistic and requires substantial support, including help with communication, daily routines, and managing sensory issues. For years, Dimity managed all aspects of his care, but she recognized his desire for independence and began planning for a future where others could assist.
Dimity found it difficult to relinquish control and trust others with Stu’s well-being, experiencing stress that led to a medical event. She is now working to document her roles as Stu’s advocate and manager, hoping to create a clear framework for a wider circle of support. She negotiates with disability support agencies to expand their responsibilities and involves Stu’s siblings and extended family in his care. Dimity reports that sharing the care load has strengthened her relationship with Stu.
When he lived at home, challenges made it difficult to express affection, but now he initiates physical contact during visits, holding her hand and cuddling. She views caring for her son and her grandchildren as her primary role and is focused on ensuring his continued support, even in her absence.
